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September 21, 2005
R U Going Straight To Hell?
I hadn’t seen the entire season of R U The Girl? with Chilli and T-Boz. The show where they try to replace Lisa Left Eye Lopes but say they aren’t replacing her because she can’t be replaced because, you know, she passed and everything. I don’t know, something about this replacing dead members of the band with a reality TV show thing is really gross to me. Rock Star INXS – didn’t watch it, but dude, I don’t think you can really do that. But they ARE doing it so I guess it can be done. I used to bring a picture of Michael Hutchence into Fantastic Sam’s and tell the little no-skills-having beauty school dropouts that I want it just like this. I always left with a mushroom cap for a haircut but I kept going back for some reason. The lower middle class dollar is a loyal one regardless of the shitty services it affords you.
Regardless, I did watch the finale where they ended up choosing O’So Krispie, a person with a total lisp, to sing and dance and rap on TLC’s latest song “I Bet” which makes reference to Usher’s Confessions. You know, Usher had insane success writing songs that supposedly clown his ex Chilli and now Chilli needed to respond to that musically. The thing is though, Usher is the winner here because um, well, he didn’t hire O’So Krispie to help him with the lyrics. Usher has insane leverage now to just take it to another level or he’ll just ignore it and be the ultimate winner in this battle rap. Funny, I never thought the media gave a shit about the Usher and Never-Letting-Go-Of-My-Baby-Bangs Chilli union. Usher is a bad tipper by the way. Remember my ex J from LA? He was a waiter and he waited on him and that fool sent the sandwich back a billion times, only to take one bite and then he left a goose egg. That’s what I said. A GOOSE EGG.
Anyway, I was sitting in front of the TV alone watching the finale of this R U The Girl? business and I kept yelling at J to PLEASE hurry up and get out of the shower. You’re missing O’So Krispie you jackass! He jumps out of the shower and sits on the edge of the bed watching the show with me.
The conversation goes like this:
ME: Dude, don’t you think this is sorta fucked up?
J: Fucking tasteless, babe.
ME: Aaliyah and Left Eye are in heaven right now auditioning girls for their new show…
(without missing a beat) J: Called R U Fucking Kidding Me?
That was totally inappropriate. We know.
Posted by melissah at September 21, 2005 01:47 PM