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February 12, 2008

Go Go. Go Shorty...

And you know we don't give a fuck 'cause it's my birfday.

My husband said that Mariah Carey released her new single Touch My Body just for me, today, on my birthday and I totally believe it. She even makes a reference to Wendy Williams in the song. Another one of my favorites. Did you know Wendy Williams mentioned MerchDirect on her show a couple weeks ago when she was talking about Old Dirty Bastard doing merch. Yes, we do his merch. Wait til you see the Jesus I'm Rolling With You car shade. O. M. G. Too cute. Anyway, she mispronounced it Merchant Direct (why?) but still, she was talking to us. I was tripping. My point is Mariah put that song out for me on my birthday. And she loves Hello Kitty? This shit is kismet, I'm telling you.

I'm spending the (birth)day enjoying all my friends, you included, and my family. I got Hello Kitty candy bracelets, a bobble head doll of Harvey the Empire carpet man, yes 800.588.2300. I got a chemical peel. Hurts so good. I got a little dinner party this Friday with some homies. I got a new car. Whaaaaaat? Yes, got a new car. I'm cute back in the BMW. Just how I like it. No bells and whistles to distract me. Just seat warmers, automatic windows, good cup holders and tint. Black on black. I was in a Volvo before. Which was fantastic. Justin Beck chose that for me on my 29th birthday saying he wanted his future wife and his future children to be in the safest car on the market (could you just die?). But now I'm back in the BMW which is what I was rolling around in in LA. It's a little throwback to my stomping around in heels going out with The Gays every Tuesday falling asleep in all my makeup days. Oh my. Remember that shit? Memories.

So...

I am, like, so okay with being 31. It's really not that bad. Thirty was just depressing because it was all for whom the bell tolls and shit. I was like, I'm so over. But now that I got past that, I'm okay. I exfoliated my entire body this morning and then lotioned all up and stared myself down for about five minutes. I found some dimples, a few bizarre dark spots and a random wrinkle or two but then I did the B Scott Paw Paw dance and was like, "Fuck this shit, I'm happy with what I am at 31." I put some clothes on and went on about my business.

I am hitting some milestones in this decade. I got married and the shit was mentioned in the New York Daily News. Did you see it? Just a little blurb in the wedding announcements. I shouldn't say it, but my story blew the other ones out of the water. Well, except for Perniece's. Her announcement was really cute. She was quoted as saying she felt like Beyonce and her husband was Jay-Z. I wished I said that in mine, but I didn't.

And what else?

Um, I'm trying to get it cracking and rolling on the baby tip. I did not think it would be this difficult. All my life, all the women around me would be like, "I'm pregnant..." just like that. But every month it's a no go. Is it because I'm 30-ish? Ugh. But still. I have hope. I want that baby yesterday. Every day there's an announcement that another celebrity is pregnant (again) and I want to snatch somebody up but still. My turn will come soon, I think.

I'm just really happy.

I know I've been neglecting this here blog. I apologize. I'm shorry. You have to be remindin' me. I have truly just been busy being happy and shit. Like a damn fool. Running around all joyful and shit.

I have lots to tell. I do. I just never get around to the sharing aspect of it all.

I tried to come up with something really fantastic about my wedding but every time I sat down to write it, nothing came out. And it's not that there isn't anything to share. It's just that it's so great and so not readily able to be put into words. Shit was a great day. On so many levels. I'm just stupid I'm so happy.

So when I come down from the highest of high and I'm back to my regular sarcastic, stank self I'm sure my writing will flourish.

Thanks for all your birthday messages on my MySpace. You are all too kind. Thank you a million billion. Love you lots.

Posted by melissah at February 12, 2008 04:18 PM